Friday, October 12, 2012

Hotel Horror Story

Since it is October, and all of the ghosts and goblins are out anyway I am going to tell you a story. It is a true story and only happened last Monday. The characters are real, the places are real, and I am not even changing any names! Bwahahahaha!!! Scared yet?

On a dark and stormy night....Ok, ok, it was a bright chilly afternoon...a group of people squished into a little car pulled up in front of a "quality" inn that had been booked through choicehotels.com. (It was me, my kids, and my parents...shh). The first sign something was not right was the "lady" of the night (ahem....broad daylight) selling her wares in the parking lot. The family didn't think too much of it but a still small sense of foreboding began to creep over them.

Into the "quality" inn they went and found their room. The kids were anxious because they wanted to jump right into the sparkling pool they had seen in the pictures on the internet. After a quick inspection their mother deemed it safe and let them change into swimsuits. The sense of foreboding grew stronger as they entered the sleeping room in their "quality" suite and found what appeared to be high velocity blood splatter stains on the curtains that wouldn't quite close. At this point the family should have just turned around and left the horror hotel but they were going to stick it out.

While the kids were in the pool the mother (yes me ;)) was reading the signs posted around the pool and noticing phrases like "if you have a contagious disease do not get in the pool" "if you have open wounds do not get in the pool" Ewwwww. The children had only been in the pool for a few minutes when their grandparents came flying around the corner to say "We cannot stay in that room, there is an electrical outlet hanging out of the wall AND there is no peephole!!". Needless to say the children were pulled out of the pool so the next step in the hotel horror story could commence.
Now you might think that it is not such a bad thing to have no peephole except when there is just a hole in the door.
from outside the room
The "quality" staff was helpful and gave the patrons keys to a new room, the new room that reeked of smoke. The patrons simply closed the door and headed back to the front desk. Upon entrance to the third and final room the mother of the two children (ok, ok, again it was me!) looked around and didn't want to put anything down. There was something brown smeared on the carpet near the couch, there was crud all over the couch the two children would be sleeping on, and something (no one could identify what) all over the coffee table.

The smart devices that had been plugged into the walls were charged enough that reviews could be read on the "quality" inn. Stories of bed bugs, unmentionables being sold in the vending machine next to the nutrigrain bars, and other nastiness finally sent the family heading for the hills. They didn't know where they were going but they were not staying there. A pizza place of good quality was found, a new hotel booked, and a happier night with no bed bugs was had.

To end our story though, the next morning the matriarch of the group (hi mom! ) was telling the story to the desk clerk of the "comfort"able inn we stayed in (they had fresh baked cookies when we checked in).  When the location of the "quality" inn was revealed the clerks eyes grew wide and she told of a body found in the wall of a hotel where we had been!!! Bwahahahaha....aren't you glad the family came back from their adventure alive?

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