It is Friday, the sun is shining brightly, like every red blooded American I am looking forward to the weekend.
However, today I feel beat down. There is a lot going on at work, people are sneaky and I am missing my kids. I should be looking forward to hanging out with my girlfriends that I am going to play Bunco with but I am feeling guilty about leaving my kids and hubby behind for the evening. I worked late (10pm late) twice this week and didn't get to see them at all. I worked 40 minutes over last night and didn't get to see my kids for very long.
I feel like a bad friend because I have invested close to zero in the woman that speak truth into my life this past year.
I know I should feel blessed that I have a job "in this economy".
I just know I want to be with my kids and my husband more often and I would love to be with the rest of our families more often as well.
I had a friend come in and tell me about the speaker that was at work yesterday. The guy talked about taking ownership of your feelings and how you control how you are feeling.
Well, today I am feeling anxious. The last time I felt like this was several months before I got married. I was living with three girls and things were not going well. I had serious anxiety for a couple of months until I was out of that situation.
Hopefully the weekend will bring renewed perception and a better attitude on Monday
Sorry for the downer NaBloPoMo today, it is hard to write something upbeat and fun when I feel like this. Tomorrow will be better. :)